Monkey Whizz Review: Does Monkey Whizz Work?
If you are prone to the odd smoke or night of partying then depending on where you are in the world, you could face the dreaded call to take a urine drug test.
Loads of people are looking for a decent Monkey Whizz review, because they need fake urine to submit for a urine sample drug test. Usually this is for employment, and if the sample fails then they are not going to get the job.
So what’s the deal? Does Monkey Whizz work? Or is it now an old formula that doesn’t contain the ingredients a reputable drug testing lab will look for to check the sample is genuine? Basically, can it get you through a simple urine drug test successfully?
Well, in this detailed review of Monkey Whizz synthetic urine we going to cover everything you need to know before you decide whether to buy Monkey Whizz, or whether you should go with another brand synthetic urine.
What Exactly Is “Monkey Whizz”?
The first thing we need to talk about is what Monkey Whizz is not. It’s not the Whizzinator.
The Whizzinator is an incredibly expensive synthetic urine and dispensing device that is from a different company. It’s a good product, but very overpriced and not what we are reviewing here.
Monkey Whizz is a synthetic urine from a company called “Serious Monkey bizziness”. It sold in smoke shops, through third-party websites, and from the main company website.
Serious Monkey Bizzness Products
As well as Monkey Whizz synthetic urine, the company SMB make a range of products that have been used for years:
- Monkey Dong.
This is a synthetic penis dispenser. You can dispense the synthetic urine through it it and even if it’s a supervised drug test, as long as you are discreet and at the right angle, it can look like you are basically going through the correct physical situation to submit the sample. It also contains Monkey Whizz urine, so it is the complete kit.
- Monkey Flask.
It’s basically Monkey Whizz in a bottle rather than pouches. It’s cheaper, but you don’t get the belt and dispenser, literally just a bottle with heat strip. Which is fine if you definitely know it’s an unsupervised drug test.
- Monkey Urine.
This is dehydrated synthetic urine that can be mixed up to make a quantity of actual liquid synthetic urine.
- Monkey Whizz.
This is the ready-mix synthetic urine kit, complete with a belt. The difference is that the synthetic urine is in soft pouches that are tucked into the belt, ready to be dispensed, rather than in a plastic flask bottle.
What Do You Get When You Buy Monkey Whizz?
Now that we have covered the other main products they sell, let’s talk specifically about what we are actually reviewing here, Monkey Whizz synthetic urine.
For your money, you are either getting the synthetic urine belt and pouches of the synthetic urine, or if you buy a flask kit, you get plastic container full of it, with heat strip.
Whichever you choose, the objective is the same, to submit a fake urine sample in a lab environment and have it tested and passed as real. Which product you choose will depend on how confident you are on the type of test you are facing.
What Happens With A Urine Drug Test?
Most urine drug tests are unsupervised which means that you can simply walk behind the screen or into a different room, and pour it out of the bottle into the test container.
So for that purpose Monkey Whizz synthetic urine in a bottle will be fine.
But if you are not sure about the type of test you are facing, then the synthetic urine belt kit, or if you want to be even safer the Monkey Dong are the way to go. If you’re female, obviously the synthetic urine belt is your only choice.
You can then submit a sample discreetly even with someone in the room. It’s very rare unless it’s some enforcement test that anyone will be staring directly at you, it’s just a precaution to stop you from literally pouring a sample from a bottle.
You can read more on synthetic urine here.
How To Use Monkey Whizz
- Activate the heat pad and stick it to the package containing the fake urine. Make sure you stick it to the side opposite to where the temperature strip is.
- You can speed up the heating process by microwaving it for a few seconds first if you want to get it into the right temperature range, before sticking on the temperature pads.
- Once the heat is applied, put it against your body to keep it at the right temperature. If you just use the heat pad it will take about an hour to reach body temperature.
- Go to your lab appointment and make sure you check the temperature before you go in and submit your sample. It needs to be above 90°F, and below 100°F to be a legal sample.
Where To Buy Monkey Whizz
So where do you buy Monkey Whizz if you want to give it a whirl?
Monkey Whizz Amazon? No! Don’t go near any fake urine products on Amazon. They are usually fake, or at the very least out of date
You are looking to buy it from a high quality specialist online retailer, someone like this shop for example.
It’s not available in shops like Walmart, and although you can buy it in headshops, again same problem, it could have been stored really poorly and not be in good condition.
Monkey Whizz Review Conclusion: Does Monkey Whizz Work?
When it comes to answering the question does Monkey Whizz work, we are basically looking at its ingredients and evidence from people who have used it.
In terms of its ingredients, one key question is does Monkey Whizz contain creatinine and uric acid, two key markers a lab will look for? The answer is, yes it does.
It also looks and smells like the real deal, and as the correct pH level.
So in terms of passing a basic employment drug test, you are probably going to be okay using Monkey Whizz.
In terms of anecdotal evidence, a few friends have used it for basic employment tests, usually the cheapest pre-employment test, and have passed. People on forums are saying the same thing.
Where it seems to fall down is in the more advanced testing, basically where they are more thorough in what they check for.
Say for example you caused an accident at work, then you might be scrutinized more closely in the more expensive drug test, in that sort of situation Monkey Whizz is probably not your best first choice.
Alternatives To Monkey Whizz Synthetic Urine
So Monkey Whizz does work, and the conclusion of this Monkey Whizz review is that it is a high quality synthetic urine that can get you through basic drug tests.
On top of that, it’s affordable (check prices here) and the kits are very flexible. You don’t just get left with a bottle to pour out of, you can choose to dispense it from the synthetic belt, or go the whole mile and use the fake dong kit.
But if you want to be extra certain of passing a urine drug test then it’s probably not your best first choice as I’ve already said.
For me, there are two other brands which are better. Quick Fix and Sub Solution do the job because they have a more complex formula. They contain things like urea, plus several other natural markers that some labs look for in testing.
Both of those brands are the best, being number one and number two, but for me, Sub Solution is the number one choice if you can afford it and if you really need the best guarantee possible though. There are two reasons for this:
- Sub Solution does not contain biocide. This is a synthetic preservative is not present in human urine. Many brands of synthetic urine do contain it, and some labs now include checking for its presence in their testing.
- Sub Solution contains a more reliable and flexible heating system. It is a heat activation powder that you simply pour in.
Not only does this give you a more rapid heating and tighter control of the temperature, but it doesn’t require a microwave, meaning you can top it up just before you go into your test if you need extra heat.
So sure, grab yourself some Monkey Whizz if you are short of time, or at a low level urine drug test. It’s a really good quality synthetic urine that won’t let you down in a basic situation.